Awake last night again. I want to complain about not sleeping but I know I should be positive. Does anyone else have to consistently tell themselves to be positive. I see people like Gary Vee who are always so up beat and I wonder why I can’t be like that. But then I know there are opposites in this world so it only makes sense there would be him there is me. I’m not even a complete opposite. I just think being positive comes more naturally to others. Sleep comes more naturally to others. Maybe that is the key, real sleep? I thought about writing last night while I was awake but I knew the sceen wouldnt help. So at 2:30 I found some sleep music and turned it on. I think it helped. I only remember one of the two tracks, both an hour long…. I should get in the shower. I am wasting water… it is hard to be positive about a situation like not sleeping though. Where is the silver ling? I guess I got a few hours of sleep before I got up at 5:50. Maybe a few is better than none. I know what none feels like. I am annoyed but i know I will get over it. Could be time to get meds. I drank for a while. But I don’t drink now, again? now and don’t want to self medicate.